For some time now we’ve known that ’80s fashion was roaring back. First it was the tights. Then the neon shoes. Both of which I’d rolled my eyes at when I spotted them in store windows.

Then, last month, my monthly Glamour magazine arrived and once again the reality of the latest fashion was in my face.

On the cover was not only a blue leopard print dress with ruffles but a pink belt with heart buckle that I seriously remember having as a 6-year-old. When I finally found the article about cover girl Katy Perry, whom I still don’t recognize, she was posing with a pair of white heart shaped sunglasses that I had as an 8-year-old. Not kidding. (Somewhere our family historian Aunt Bev has the proof in a photo that also features three of my other sisters sporting their ’80s eyewear. We are also all clad in florescent two-piece swimsuits that were also all the rage back then.)

So, yes. I feel old. Very, very old. No one wants the clothes they wore as a kid to come back around so quickly...

But, what is even more disturbing is that my littlest sister Jessica — who is not in the above mentioned photo because, as my grandmother likes to say, she was still “a twinkle in the sky” when it was taken — is dressing like the cover model and insists it is the height of fashion.

The last time I was home visiting she was wearing snow boots that I threw away in 1987 with her tights with a flannel shirt I also outgrew at the same time.

She tells me that in my Gap jeans and cable knit sweaters I’m borderline “frumpy” and have begun to dress “like such an old lady.” All my clothes, are from “like twelve seasons ago,” she tells me. I counter she is the one wearing the stirrup pants that I fought with Mom about having to wear in grade school. But what do I know? She is the fashion design major…

It has all made me accept that I will never be a “fashionista.” It’s just not going to happen. Ever. I’m also never going to regularly wear makeup. I’ve attempted numerous times to get on the bandwagon but I always fall off before getting a chance to sit down.

My husband tells me that I have a “classic” fashion style and that he likes me better without makeup.

I think he is being honest but I suspect it’s also both a way to prevent me from doing a lot of clothing shopping and a nice way of saying what a kid in my 10th grade math class told me once (I was clad in a sweatshirt and jeans with my slightly chlorine tinged green hair pulled back in a pony-tail): “You look homely.”

Of course my husband always follows his comments with “I think you’re beautiful,” which I both truly believe and appreciate. Although, I remind him, like I used to my mom, “You’re supposed to think that.”

Now that I’m “old and married,” according to my sisters, I’ve finally come to accept and embrace homely. Though I prefer the second dictionary meaning “simply, comfortable and unpretentious” as opposed to the first, “plain, or less than pleasing in appearance” and definitely not the third, “ugly.”

I really just don’t put that much importance on clothing trends. While I definitely try to look professional I will probably never accomplish making sure every outfit is trendy or in this season’s latest color.

Besides, if I just keep the same clothes around long enough. Eventually they will be fashionable again. Like, Duh.

CARRIE STAMBAUGH can be reached at cstambaugh@dailyindependent.com or (606) 3236-2653.